Turkey Times Two

Between the two of us, SVV and I have spent six Thanksgivings on the other side of the pond, far from any trace of family or familiarity. In my opinion, that’s six Thanksgivings too much. Our first Turkey Day together, actually, was when we were living in Holland in 2005, and believe you me, you don’t know the definition of “determined” until you’ve tried to organize an authentic Thanksgiving dinner in a non-Thanksgiving-celebrating country. Our small class of 19 students hailed from eight countries; four or us were American. Three of those four were not wild about living in Holland (it is an entirely different story living as an American-in-the-Netherlands as opposed to merely visiting as one), so in an effort to make it feel more like home, we orchestrated a Turkey Day feast and invited a handful of our classmates.

Only a couple of problems surfaced. One: Megan and I were doing much of the cooking/preparing, but didn’t have anything other than a two-eye hotplate in our Cinderella-like living arrangement (in the attic of the 72-year-old Surinamese bitch’s house). So we enlisted the fourth of the Americans, Khari, to host. Two: Khari had a minuscule kitchen + a crazy-ass, certified-alcoholic roommate, Miguel, who proceeded to get wasted and show all his collection of bottles pasted with pictures of naked ladies. (He even asked one of the male guests to model for his “artwork”: “Tell me a story! Come into my bedroom!” he shouted throughout the afternoon.) Three: Turkey isn’t exactly a Dutch delicacy. In the end, we found a poultry store that offered to go out and shoot a bird for us (we were half-expecting it to be delivered complete with feathers; we were more than thrilled when we turned out to be mistaken). Four: SVV was cooking the actual turkey and lived in a neighboring town a half an hour away by car. He had to transport the bird by way of bus, as did Megan and I with our platters of Jello and no-bake pumpkin cheesecake (again, improvisation was necessary). Five: Procuring said pumpkin was a feat in itself and wound up requiring a couple-hour trip north to an expat shop that stocked American canned goods. Yes, it was quite the challenge.

But it turned out to be a story for the books and one I wouldn’t trade for a holiday meal with Paula Deen. Still, the past few Thanksgivings, I’ve been recovering for ones lost, which is precisely why SVV and I celebrated TWICE this time around. On actual Thanksgiving itself, Jemima — she of kitchen prowess and unparalleled domesticity — invited us to her newlywed lawyer friends Helen and Matt’s house (they have a real-life dining room table !for 12! Who in San Francisco proper owns a house with an actual dining room, let alone one that fits 12, I ask you?!) for a sinful soiree where the menu consisted of (but was not limited to):

Butternut Squash and Apple Soup
Molasses and Cider Brined Heirloom Turkey Bird
Mom’s Dressing (not to be confused with stuffing, which is just wrong)
Roasted Mushroom and Barley Gravy
Sweet Potato Biscuits with/out Ham
Mac and Cheese Casserole
Shrimp Pie
Cranberry Relish
Brussel Sprouts with Shallots
Gingered Green Beans
Pecan and Pumpkin Pies

(That’s her hubby Simons trying to act like he owns the kitchen. Don’t let him fool you: He’s simply Jemima’s minion.) Is it possible to die from pleasure? If so, I went to the grave that cheerful day. I ate not one, not two, but FOUR of those scrumptious sweet potato pie treats, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. In fact, my plate was twice the size of Moose’s head. Observe:

I find it hard to believe any subsequent meal can top Jemima’s fare. Still, we tried to match it with a weekend trip to SVV’s family’s home in Sac and were quite successful thanks to another pair of in-house chefs (SVV’s sis, Lisa, and her husband Chris). One thing I should tell you about the VV family: There are A LOT of them. Don’t believe me? We had to push three kitchen tables together to get all SIXTEEN of us to fit.

But what’s a holiday without a little family closeness? (We couldn’t have gotten any closer if we’d wanted to.)